Reignite the Spark: The Psychology of Erotic Novelty

You don’t have to fake being newly in love. You can recreate the thrill with the partner you already adore. 

Research by found that shared novel experiences increase passion and relationship satisfaction. That’s because novelty triggers the same brain circuits involved in the initial stages of romantic love. 

Try something brand new, it can be sexually, emotionally, or experientially. Go dancing. Try a new sexual position. Book a spontaneous overnight getaway. Even laughing over an unexpected experience can light the fire again. 

Too many couples think the spark fades because they’ve “changed” - but often, it’s just the routine talking. Novelty reminds you both of your capacity for fun, flirtation, and surprise. It breaks the autopilot. 

UNDRESSED Tips:

1) Make a reservation at a restaurant neither of you have ever been before.

2) Book a trip to a place you have never been before. If you have never been on a city trip choose that. If you have never been to a SPA together choose that. If you have never been on a ski trip choose that (if you are brave).

3) Each partner makes a “novelty list”. 5 things you’ve never done together that sound fun, sexy, or adventurous. Pick one each week and go for it and after 10 weeks write new ones (if you need, but maybe you already have the habit 

4) Get UNDRESSED Intimacy Card for 69 fun and naughty invitations to connect

Resources: 

• Aron, A., et al. (2000). Self-expanding activities and romantic passion.